I personally feel that there is no pain greater, than what a mother suffers, after the death of her child. For, the pain penetrates to our soul, and the very essence of our identity. Because, since the day that my kids were born, my identity was, that I am the " mother of two kids." And now, when someone ask me, how many kids do you have? I, almost, feel as though I'm defending my identity, by saying," I had two kids, but one of them died. But the truth is, my identity will always be that, I'm the" mother of two kids." And the day that our son, Paul' Andre "Williams, Jr. ( 24 ), died, there became a void so deep in my heart and soul, that only GOD can touch it. Even if I had fifteen other kids, and loved every one of them, dearly, none of them can fill, that sacred void.I'm eternally grateful to God, for blessing my husband and I, to still have our other son, Cleavon Jermaine Williams, who is 23 years old, now. For he is always referred to as our, miracle child. He was born two months premature, on May 11, 1985, and weighed 3lbs.and 6ozs. Then he was immediately rushed to another hospital's, Pediatric Intensive Care Unit. One week later, he developed a deadly infection called, necrotizing enterocolitis, which caused a portion of his intestines to become gangrene. His Dr. told us that, the infection had already invaded his whole system, and the only reason he's still alive, is the breathing machine. He said that, without immediate surgery, his chance of dying was 100%! And even with surgery, he most likely won't survive. But they'd rather do surgery, than to do nothing at all. So, they allowed the family to quickly say our goodbyes! For they really didn't give us any hope. It felt as though I was seeing my precious baby alive, for the last time!, as they hurriedly rolled him into surgery. While family and friends gathered, we all prayed for a miracle. Thank God We Received It! Cleavon survived the surgery! We were all ecstatic with joy! And to make a long story short, Cleavon endured three more surgeries. He developed severe asthma, plus a very rare form of epilepsy. He literally, almost died several times. And only by the Grace of God, he's alive, today! And I can't imagine life without him. Although he's hearing impaired, I thank God he's not totally deaf. Today, Cleavon is a handsome, good-hearted, loving young man.For it's so much I could say about his experiences, that I could actually write a book. Because of Cleavon's various, near-death episodes, we always worried about the possibility, that we may have to face life without him, one day. Never in my wildest dreams, did I imagine that it would be, our son, "Andre," that we'd have to live without. I'll never forget the date, May 10,2000, the day before Cleavon's 15th birthday. That is the day, that countless lives, were instantly changed forever.For to make another, long story short, my nephew was running late for work, and lost control of his car. He ended up slamming into a tree, and then hit a concrete light pole. Tragically, his two best friends, Morgan Alfred, Jr. ( 20 ), and Deshawn Mcintyre, ( 19 ), were killed on impact. And "Andre" and my nephew were rushed to Broward General Medical Center, in critical condition. When we finally arrived at the hospital, the doctor told us that, "Andre's" injuries were extremely severe, and there's nothing they can do to save him. There are no words to describe the heart- wrenching feelings of pure agony, despair, and complete devastation, from seeing your child connected to machines from head to toe. It just seemed so unreal, that the man lying in that hospital bed, was our loving son, "Andre". For we were so accustomed to him laughing, and joking, and having that beautiful, contagious smile, that everyone loved so dearly. And he always, had a nickname for anyone he felt close to. It was absolutely overwhelming, seeing him on a Jet Respirator , that was very noisy, and it caused his whole body to shake uncontrollably.Then his Dr. informed us that, his neck was completely severed, his lungs were crushed, and he had extremely severe trauma, to the back of his head. He also said, that anyone could visit him, to say their goodbyes, because they didn't expect him to survive through the night.

                                                                                                       

                         

          When I initially started building this website, I had no idea that God was guiding me through another stage of my healing process. I just felt compelled to do something special in honor of " Andre," Morgan, and Deshawn. I figured if I could inspire one person to remember to slow down and drive safely, then at least their deaths would not be in vain. And it could potentially spare another family from being sentenced to A lifetime of heartache and despair, as we've been dealt. But God works in mysterious ways! He knew that since" Andre's" death, I felt that I was unable to look at his pictures, although I desperately longed to see his face, I avoided it at all cost. It was just too painful! But God knew that I needed to conquer that fear in order to encourage someone else to do the same. So as I began putting this website together and browsing through literally hundreds of photographs, and gathering them up, I suddenly realized that I was not just only looking at" Andre's" pictures, but I was also cropping and resizing them, and looking for as many as I could find. And to my amazement, it was such A comfort to finally look at his face and allow myself to remember the good times we shared. This was A major accomplishment for me, especially since I wanted it so badly! I've even revisited so many of my most painful emotions that I had subconsciously suppressed for several years. Fortunately I truly needed that release in order to effectively guide someone else through their painful journey. Which ultimately means that God has gotten Glory from my pain! So if by chance this website doesn't inspire anyone else, it is certainly not in vain. For only God knew that this website would serve as A vehicle to propel me to my next healing level. " And to God be the Glory! "